So I spent my day (or the first half of it at least, it’s only 1 PM now), reading a freshly pressed blog http://nerdyapplebottom.com
It’s funny. And honest, and I feel like I can relate to the writer, even though I don’t have any kids. I’m not even married.
Take a look at her blog. She really is quite the writer. But that’s not entirely the point I was going to make. The point is this:
Can anyone ever be really truly happy? Can I be truly happy? So yes, I got a job, and it’s out of this dump of a town, away from people who are negative towards me. And yes, I’m excited, because I’m moving back to my man, and my friends, and family, and my darling sister. Not that I’m happy about leaving the other sister, but she’ll be joining us in a few weeks anyway. So yes, I’m excited. But I’m not really happy about the job. It’s not a step up on a higher rung on the ladder that is my career. I just got off my ladder, and started climbing a new one. So it’s not very appealing to me. I’m doing the same thing, for the same salary (in an environment where living costs are much higher) and I’d be working more hours. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not lazy. I’m willing to work hard. I just don’t know what I’m working for anymore. It doesn’t feel like I’m building a career. I’m losing my passion. I can see myself in 20 years, still working this mediocre job.
And few things scare and sadden me more than mediocrity. I wasn’t born to be ordinary. So I have a plan. And everybody will hate it. And maybe it’s not a good idea in the first place. But I’m going to think about it some, and if I’m ready, I will share.
On a side note, please send the most positive energy you can muster into the universe: My man is looking at a job too, and we’re hoping he gets it. Also, I have less than ONE week to move. And I’m broke. <Insert profanity here> And my sister might be very sick. 😦